Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Confirmed Bachelor

A marriage broker goes to see Mr. A, a confirmed bachelor for many
years.

"Mr. A, don't let it get too late. I have exactly the woman you need.
You only have to say the word and you'll meet and be married in no
time!" the marriage broker said.

"Don't bother;" replied Mr. A, "I've got two sisters at home, who look
after all my needs. I am happy with that arrangement."

"That's all well and good, but all the sisters in the world cannot
fill the role of a wife," the marriage broker countered.

"I said 'two sisters'. I didn't say they were mine..."

Sunday, December 21, 2008

How Government Works

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of
a desert. Congress said,

- "Someone may steal from it at night."

So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the
job. Then Congress said,

- "How does the watchman do his job without instruction?"

So they created a planning department and hired two people, one person
to write the instructions, and one person to do time studies. Then
Congress said,

- "How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks correctly?"

So they created a Quality Control Department and hired two people, one
to do the studies and one to write the reports. Then Congress said,

- "How are these people going to get paid?"

So they created the following positions, a timekeeper, and a payroll
officer, then hired two people. Then Congress said,

- "Who will be accountable for all of these people?"

So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an
Administrative Officer, a Deputy Administrative Officer, and a
secretary. Then Congress said,

- "We have had this in operation for one year and we are $1,000,000
over budget, we must cutback overall cost."

So they laid off the night watchman.