Sunday, August 27, 2006

Comparative Book Reports Clinton vs. Titanic

In an English writing class, students were assigned two books to read and then submit book reports. The books were; "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton. One smart ass student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories! His enlightened professor gave him an A+ for this report:

Titanic: $29.99 Clinton : $29.99 Titanic: Over 3 hours to read Clinton : Over 3 hours to read Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe. Clinton : The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe. Titanic: Jack is a starving artist. Clinton : Bill is a bullshit artist. Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar. Clinton : Ditto for Bill. Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined. Clinton : Ditto for Monica. Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit. Clinton : Let's not go there. Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry. Clinton : Monica's forced to return her gifts. Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life. Clinton : Clinton doesn't remember Jack. Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen. Clinton : Monica.....ooh, let's not go there, either. Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death. Clinton : Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing.

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