Tuesday, February 05, 2008

Catholic Horse Racing

One day while he was at the track betting on the ponies and nearly
losing his shirt, Mitch noticed a priest who stepped out onto the
track and blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the
4th race. Lo and behold, that horse - a very long shot - won the race.

Mitch was most interested to see what the priest did the next race.
Sure enough, the priest stepped out onto the track as the 5th race
horses lined up, and placed a blessing on the forehead of one of the
horses Mitch made a beeline for the window, and placed a small bet on
the horse. Again, even though it was another long shot, the horse the
priest had blessed won the race.

Mitch collected his winnings, and anxiously waited to see which horse
the priest would bless for the 6th race.

The priest showed, blessed a horse, Mitch bet on it, and it won! Mitch
was elated! As the day went on, the priest continued blessing horses,
and they always came in first.

Mitch began to pull in some serious money, and by the last race, he
knew his wildest dreams were going to come true. He made a quick stop
at the ATM, withdrew his savings, and awaited the priest's blessing
that would tell him which horse to bet on.

True to his pattern, the priest stepped out onto the track before the
last race, a stakes race were owners wish to sell their horses, and
blessed the forehead, eyes, ears, and hooves of one of the horses.
Mitch bet every cent, and watched the horse come in dead last.

Mitch was dumbfounded. He made his way to the track, and when he found
the priest, he demanded, "What happened, Father? All day long you
blessed horses and they won. The last race, you blessed a horse and he
lost. Now, thanks to you, I've lost all my savings!!"

The priest nodded wisely and said, "That's the problem with you
Protestants -- you can't tell the difference between a simple blessing
and the Last Rites."

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