standing in line at the check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a
dog.
On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Eukanuba Diet
again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
hospital last time, but that I'd lost 48.5-lbs before I awakened in an
intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and
IV's in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
that it works is to load your pockets with Eukanuba nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is
nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to
mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.
Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition
because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been
sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.
I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so
hard as he staggered out the door.
Stupid idiot...why else would I buy dog food??
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